I’ve been thinking a bit more about some of the ideas presented with Psalm 127 (see here), particularly in light of influencing our children and the imagery of aiming them as arrows in spiritual warfare. Parents must refuse the culture’s insistence that children are an interruption in our “real” interests, pursuits and lives. We must first believe that children are a blessing before we can live like it, then we must take seriously, not just the education but the formation of our children.

I hate that I have to make this caveat, but I do. It is not my intention to dictate your conscience or that of your family. My wife and I have come to the conviction that, for us, home-education is our current choice. I do sometimes share the reasons why we have come to those convictions, but not as an agenda for home-education. I know that many well-meaning Christians say that if you don’t educate your children at home that you are somehow “giving in.” I don’t believe that. It is not my intention to change anyone’s conscience on this issue, just to share some of the things that have shaped ours.

One of the first things that comes to the fore of many home education conversations is the idea of socialization. The charge, of course, is that children educated at home will lack the necessary social skills needed to be active and productive members of society. But it shouldn’t take most of us long to realize that much of the “socialization” we received in public schools (for those of us who attended public schools) was anything but positive. In fact, thinking back a bit on my own “socialization,” a certain proverb comes to mind (13:20):

Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise,
but the companion of fools will suffer harm.

It’s not necessary to discuss whether I was the companion or the fool or both. But what is necessary to discuss is that Christians must be able to think and respond biblically to such arguments as the “socialization” argument. When we consent to allow others to raise and influence our children, much less, when we allow some of their biggest influences to be their peers, it with much less confidence that we can say they are walking with the wise.

A quick listen to the conversation of many young people (though it’s certainly not age-discriminate) should convince us that “the mouths of fools pour out folly” (Proverbs 15:2) and a quick trip down memory lane ought to remind us that “bad company ruins good morals” (1 Corinthians 15:33). Surely this just goes with common sense. If you stand on a chair and try to pull someone up to you who is on the ground trying to pull you down, who is going to win? It’s much easier to pull someone down than it is to pull someone up, especially someone who does not want to be pulled up. Put your child in a room full of kids who don’t want to be “pulled up” and now we’re told that this developing their social skills.

If Deuteronomy 6 teaches us anything, surely it teaches us that parents are to have the primary role in the formation of their children and despite what our society tells us, this certainly means spending time with our children pouring into them, because if we’re not, someone else is.

All of this is to simply point out that the “socialization” argument against home education is only convincing if we want children who think and act like the rest of the world. The truth is that social skills derive from a variety of settings and situations and if we’re raising children to be adults, shouldn’t they receive more social input from adults than peers? This used to be the norm, as children either worked on the farm with adults or followed in their father’s profession, but since then, we have come to believe that it is healthy for them to be surrounded by people their own age with the same weaknesses.

The church must do better at encouraging and equipping parents to think through these and other issues from a biblical foundation to pursue biblical standards.

• Read Shepherding a Child’s Heart by Tedd Tripp
• Read Everyday Talk: Talking Freely and Naturally about God With Your Children by John Younts
• Read Teach Them Diligently: How To Use The Scriptures in Child Training by Lou Priolo